Half of Him Used to Be in My Scrotum

- He's sitting in my lap as I type.

- He should be doing 40 words per minute by the time he's five.

- I expect great things from him.

- or I'm going to be "mad, real mad, Joe Jackson"

- No, seriously, he moves his neck already.

- He eats like a baby elephant. He's like Unicron Jr.

- If you don't know who Unicron is, then you won't like me.

- So far, we know he likes N*E*R*D and Jill Scott.

- All he pretty much does his literally, eat, sleep, and shit, with short bouts of exercise when he keeps his eyes open. That's why we call him Snorlax.

- Jasmine calls him Fidget because he. . . fidgets.

- My grandmothers call him Tre. For three.

- c h njkjn

- I just made let him type.

- He's adorable.

- I don't know if those are fireworks or gunshots, but if it's the latter, niggas must be playing real-life Doom outside.