Thursday, July 23, 2009


First off, my son freaks me out.

What normal babies do when you put a bottle on their lips: Open their mouths and drink milk.

What my son does when you put a bottle to his lips: Ravenously attacks the bottle until he feels that it's weak enough for him to prey upon it.

What normal babies do when they spit out milk: Sit there and wait for you to wipe it off.

What my son does when he spits out milk: Proceeds to smear it all over his face.

He might be a reincarnated wolf. Werewolf maybe.

I also saw on Illseed's website (Allhiphop)that someone, since The Game is acting like a forgetful bitch, decided to find all of the instances where The Game shouts out/mentions Jay-Z. I will proceed to copy and paste all 70-something of these Jay-Z mentions.

1. "No beef with Jay" "one blood"

2. "Got a hook from Faith, no verse from Jay

I guess on Westside Story he thought I spit in his face" "Westside Story"

3. "Dre told me he ain't doin "Detox," this his only run

Ma$e comin back, and Hovi done" "No more fun and games"

4 "It's "Me & My Girlfriend" like 2Pac and them

Jay-Z and Beyonce, or Bobby and Whitney "Special"

5. "Rap critics politickin, wanna know the outcome

"Ready to Die" "Reasonable Doubt" and "Doggystyle" in one "Dreams"

6. "Make the club R.O.C. without Timberland boots "Higher"

7."I was gassed up, Murder Inc., Roc-A-Fella passed up"

8. "It took me a little while but I am now understandin

Jay ****ed up in the first round when he picked olowankandi" "Memp Bleek Iz"

9. "Oh, that boy colder than Hova unless he sober" "300 Bars"

10. "And ain't nobody tryin to take Beyonce from Jay

But I know a ***** named Superhead he ****ed back in the day" Wouldnt Get Far"

11."Took you to award shows, there go Jay right there"

"One Night"

12."Bangin "The Black Album," track #1

she like that Jay ****, that's her favorite'' "Around The World"

13. "Behind the back to Nas he alley oop to Jigga" "Why U hate The Game"

14. "Niqqas show me love in the hood like i was HOV down Flushing" "State Yo Name"

15. "The day Jay retire I'ma park next to the throne, in a Maybach on gold wires, yeah "Hands On The Pump"

16. "Cuz he know Jay-Z departed

And these other rap labels know don't feed they artists

Talkin blueprint **** you got three garages

Gettin money off Roc like little E and carter"

17. "And 2Pac was in jail the day you called to hit him up

I wouldn't be outside 40/40 bumpin 'Jigga What'"

18."I'm the king, and you better respect it

All I need is Beyonce, and a Roc-a-fella necklace"

19. "I'm the golden boy, and I'm making Hova noise

Got the whole world clapping, just like the Nolia Boys"

20. "I told 'em bomp, slow down baby

Got to get this **** firm like Foxy, NaS and AZ

She said '**** you,pay me

So I left her in AZ

That's what I get for letting her listen to my Jay-Z"

21. "*****, I'm number one, motherfukka bar none

Who else kick knowlegde outside of Hova and the God Son"

22. "U gon make me/ make Jay lose his cool" "Feel It In The Air"

23. "Too much West coast dikc lickn, remember Jay-Z? "1-800-Homicide"

24. "No Em, no Dre, I'm the hottest since Jay" "Get Up"

25. "Cause I'm the man behind the Roc like Kanye West"

26."A pimp like 50, the niqqa to leave you broke ma

6 in the mornin, you stretchin on the sofa

singin ain't no niqqa like Foxy Brown and Hova" "Compton to Fillmoe"

27. "I'm runnin the ROC, not Jay, Dame Dash of Hoffa" "Jackin 4 Beats"

28. "Who the fuk holdin me? i was just waitin 'til HOVA leave

wit my eyes on the thrown that belong to me" "Round Here Freestyle"

29. "yeah its me and young cass til hov come back" "Aim Ya Gunz"

30. "Throw Jay-z in the pot, mix em with ren

or O.J on the rocks, mix em with gin

whatchu got? the westcoast riding again" "82 Days"

31. "i found out it was a hard knock life without asking Jay" "Duck Down"

32. "Fake king of new york, U aint Jay z" "soundscan"

33. "Me, Em and 50 racin' this rap siht is basic I followed that Jay siht" "We Aint"

34. "The kings comin', no I'm not Jay-Z" "One Blood Remix"

35. "Not the rap martyr, or the second rap Carter" "for My gangstaz"

36. "niqqa I'm about a dollar, what the fuk is 50 Cent?

When Jay said it, I didn't know what it meant" "100 Bars"

37. "used to push that rock like Jay Hov" "Red Bandana"

38. "then this marcy-project niqqa came and stole the crown" "Im a soldier"

39. "But Kanye and Hova killed it without a doubt" "Just a lil Bit freestyle"

40. "Who had the hottest chick in the game, wearin they chain

Mr. H to the Izzo, Nas and Hurricane" "too Much"

41. " cuz ain't nobody movin units but Jay, pimp Juice and Us" - Down 4 my *****s freestyle

43. "I used to have visions of retiring like Jigga" "Du Rags

44. "He in a vest with a hoodrat from Marcy with a tattoo of Jay-Z name on her chest" "Its So Hard"

45. "Im classic like Detox & Blueprint 2" "Get Yo Money"

46."Yall thought it was over when Hova retired" "Get Yo Money"

47. "Make the world feel like the niqqas before 2pac Shakur Christopher Wallace & Shawn Corey" "Dont Push Me..."

48. "... He aint teach Jigga how to rhyme" "Juice freestyle"

49. "Im going to same place Jay-z went Fredrico & Pico" "100 Bars"

50. "Hov retired but Compton still pushin Roc" "On & On"

51. "I came to see chicks shake they ass like Beyonce so let me be Hov 4 a min."

52. "All I gotta do is hit her wit a Jay-Z line like u deserve to be my sunshine"

53. "Biggie Smalls is the illest so is pac Jay retired i wonder if nas gon drop" "Unbeliveable freestyle"

54. "i kno they sayin y u gotta mention Jay" "State Yo Name"

55. "First Jay & Beyonce then Nas & Kelis" "A Week Ago Part 2"

56."u 36 And U Still Rappin Uhh, Im 26 And Homie So Iz Da Dubz" "one Blood"

57."So I reconciled my differences like he did with Jigga" Game on 'Hustlers'

58. "Im ready to die Without a reasonable doubt" "The Documentary"

59. "In '99 i studied +The Chronic+ inside out,

a Doggystyle for breakfast, lunch was Reasonable Doubt " "im A Soldier freestyle"

60. "Shouldnt been influenced by Calvin Broadus, Nasir Jones & Shawn Corey" "Pain In My Life Remix"

61. Yo Jay what it do niqqa, i done rocked enough fellas,to be u niqqa,i got the 40/40,they my 2 jigga's"

62. The word n!gger, is nothing like *****

Don't sound **** alike, like Game like Jigga

63."I was more hood then suge, had more rocs then Jay

more scars on my face then the original scarface, or the homeboy scarface."

64. "i need more than 60 seconds i aint Hov"

- Hot 2Nite (Remix)

65."Moved out the hood, changed her name to Jay"

66. "He ain't Nas, ain't B.I.G., ain't Jigga" 300 bars

67. ""Pushing the rock, nah this ain't no subliminal Jay

The summer too hot, and I want the winter to stay" Dear Summer

68.""I'm fly like a Hummingbird on a tree top

The new Hov, the new B.I.G., the new 'Pac, I need three spots"

69. ""Ask a Jay-Z fan about Big Daddy Kane, don't know em, Game gon show em" - Games Pain

70. ""She call me Jay I call her B we getting married to the streets" - Camera Phone

71. ""The kings coming, no i'm not Jay-z/ too many *****s hate me, but they scared to face me" 1 blood remix

72. "So I reconciled my differences like he did with Jigga" Make The World Go Round

73. ""I hear the crowd callin my name Game, Game

but i'm not one so don't try to play me

and this goes from Gucci Mane to Jay-Z" - Laugh

74."hip hop is soft since the Roc-A-Fella break up/and i don't do subliminals I just pick Jay up" - Walk in the streets

75."I'm that six figga *****/who got the word from KRS-One and stole the Blueprint from Jigga" - Feels Good

76."They say at Summer Jam i turned it out/but Kanye and Hova killed it without a doubt" - Just a lil bit (G-Unit Diss)

77.""We on that same elevator goin down, Dodger fitted got that Hova lean so they don't notice me" - Down & Out (mixtape version)"

Yeah, yeah, I'll be original later.

Friday, July 17, 2009

My Favorite Pictures So Far




Monday, July 13, 2009

Rootin, Tootin, Bootin

I just fucking love the screen capture of my face.

Rooting Tooting Booting from Eric Richardson on Vimeo.

Sunday, July 5, 2009

Proof That I Do Anything For the People That Read My Blog

I've been wondering "Hey, what's so great about this Tiny & Toya show?" so I decided to watch the preview on youtube and commentate on what exactly is going on.


0:15 - Wait, Toya is "not over Wayne"? What is so great about this nigga? He looks like a frog's thigh and he's gotten like thirteen other broads pregnant. I must meet this guy. His personality must be super radiant.

0:20 - I can already tell I'm not going to like Tiny. Her voice is like eating a handful of wasabi. If you've ever had wasabi, then you know that shit is fatal.

0:29 - No, she doesn't need to sing. I don't even remember her ever singing when she was with Xscape. Lawl, Xscape. They're so irrelevant now.

0:35 - Wait, she's not over Lil Wayne, but she's telling her own mother she needs to get her shit together? Sounds like she has a bad case of bossy hypocrite.

0:49 - "You get back wit ma daddy Imma get back wit Wayne". Yo, I can see this show is going to be pathetic. I feel like I'm going to vomit out of my lungs.

1:13 - I don't get how Tiny's voice sounds better on the voice-overs. Maybe seeing her unattractive face move with the words make it worse.

1:21 - I swear on my life, if BET didn't give this scummycoochie a show, I would not have known she had Lil Wayne's kid.

1:27 - Where'd she get a lot of love and fame from? I don't know that bitch! At least they mention Tiny in the media every now and again. Lil Wayne goes through broads like cereal, so I didn't know anyone existed before Nivea.

2:36 - Wait, Tiny wrote "No Scrubs"? Wow. Wow.

4:24 - This Toya chick has it bad. She is way too hot to still be stressing over Dwayne Carter, who has since moved on and got around twenty women pregnant.

4:43 - Tiny is so buckethead it's insane.

5:00 - Geeking off of the knock-off version of the "Flipside" beat they are playing right now.

5:12 - Wow, Lil Wayne's mother is on here, too? I'm not surprised because your bond is stronger with a chick your son had his first child with rather than, say Lauren London. I've never liked Lauren London for some reason.

7:06 - Yo, they are country as shit. I swear while I was listening to Toya talk, one of my eyes went lazy.

7:43 - Toya's daughter speaks better than her. I don't know if that hurts my heart or makes me happier for the child.

8:35 - Tiny's voice. . .

9:33 - "Peesh" Instead of saying "peace", Tiny says "peesh". Is she doing that shit on purpose?

I'm not. . . I refuse to watch the second part right now. Just for suffering through this shit for you people, I give you this:


Sleep well.

Hating is a Lie

One thing I've been unfortunate enough to grow up to watch is the deterioration of the word "hating". The phrases "hating" and "hater" have gone the way of the term "ignorant".

Ignorant is in no way synonymous with stupidity, but it has grown to seem that way, and has been used by actual ignorant people to call other people. Let me go off of the hating rant real quick to explain the difference between stupidity and ignorance.

If someone knocks on your door and you go downstairs and open it and you get hit in the face with a hammer, that's ignorance. You didn't know the motherfucker was outside of your door with a hammer.

Now, if someone knocks on the door and you look out the window and someone yells "I'm going to hit you in your fucking face with this hammer" and you go open the door anyway, that's stupid.

Now, the word "hater" is becoming just like that. Back in the late 90's when the word gained popularity, it was coined to describe a jealous person. A person with no life outside of disliking someone doing better than them. It's not possible to hate on someone doing worse than you, which I'll get to in a minute. These people can't go a single day without mentioning the object of their envy and deny that they're obsessed with disliking this person.

Nowadays, a "hater" is simply someone with a negative opinion, which has got to be some of the pussiest shit I've ever heard.

Seriously, in hip-hop's heyday, which I would say was back in the early 90's, if someone said you sucked, you most likely sucked, or you would prove that you don't suck. Presently, if someone says you suck, they're hating because you have money, or bitches, or a record deal, or a new pair of shoes.

Suddenly, fans of rap music have taken on this "If you have nothing nice to say, don't say anything at all" mentality that is quite simply pussytastic to say the least. I mean, what kind of soft-skinned whore can't take criticism?

I most recently watched this fiasco take place on Charles Hamilton's blog. After his numerous career faux-pas, (how do I make that plural?)he ridicules his detractors by calling them "hating queers", etc, etc.

Why must someone be hating on you because you're a fuck up? If people don't like you because you're a fucking moron, you can't say they're hating. Maybe you should re-evaluate the moves you are a making.

Another trend I've noticed is that having haters makes you cool. Apparently, if you have "haters", you're on the right path. I'd have to say you're not. First and foremost, where I'm from, if someone is hating on you, you can't wave at them and say "hi". Haters in Baltimore rob and kill people. If someone sees you flashing your jewelry like a dipshit and talking about your money, you won't make it home with that jewelry and/or money. All of this "Hi Hater" and "big up to all my haters" shit is getting people murdered.

This also turns up on myspace with 14-year-old cunts claiming that they have haters and that their haters motivate them. No one is hating on you if your mom pays your phone bill and still buys your clothes, I can assure you. Matter of fact, here's a checklist of whether or not you could possibly be worth hating on.

1. Do you have your own house? Y N

2. Do you have your own car? Y N

3. Are you attractive? Y N

4. Are you in a gang? Y N (If you said yes, nodamnbody is hating on you)

5. Are you under 18? Y N

6. Have you finished high school? Y N

7. Do you come into contact with famous people? Y N

8. Have you repeated grades? Y N

9. Do you take social networking sites seriously? Y N

10. Do you even plan on doing anything with your life? Y N

Answers are:

1. Y
2. Y
3. Y
4. N
5. N
6. Y
7. N
8. N
9. N
10. Y

If you scored under a 60, congratulations, you're the kind of person that could not possibly be hated on by any person anywhere, so please shut up. There's a difference between someone not liking someone and someone hating on someone, let me give you an example.

Lame guy: Yo, you listen to Gucci Mane?
Smart dude: No, that nigga is trash.

See? He just doesn't like Gucci Mane.

Lame guy: Yo, I'm about to take out the trash.
Hater dude: Like that nigga Gucci Mane. That nigga is trash.

Notice how hater dude just randomly brought up homeboy out of nowhere? If someone brings up someone in a negative light for no particular reason except to just voice their disdain for them, they are possibly a hater. It's that easy to point them out.

Thursday, July 2, 2009


I miss Tourette's Guy.

Half of Him Used to Be in My Scrotum

- He's sitting in my lap as I type.

- He should be doing 40 words per minute by the time he's five.

- I expect great things from him.

- or I'm going to be "mad, real mad, Joe Jackson"

- No, seriously, he moves his neck already.

- He eats like a baby elephant. He's like Unicron Jr.

- If you don't know who Unicron is, then you won't like me.

- So far, we know he likes N*E*R*D and Jill Scott.

- All he pretty much does his literally, eat, sleep, and shit, with short bouts of exercise when he keeps his eyes open. That's why we call him Snorlax.

- Jasmine calls him Fidget because he. . . fidgets.

- My grandmothers call him Tre. For three.

- c h njkjn

- I just made let him type.

- He's adorable.

- I don't know if those are fireworks or gunshots, but if it's the latter, niggas must be playing real-life Doom outside.

Introducing. . .

Eric Richardson the 3rd











Sneezy F. Baby



I'll have stories for the nicknames later, but for now, baby pictures.




In other news, I think there is a bug in my foot. No, for real. I seriously think something is crawling around inside my foot. Like on the Mummy.