Monday, December 22, 2008

I'm Totally Working Right Now

To take a page from Malcolm's book.

- Okay, the fellatio/cunnilingus thing was me introducing one of my male friends to a few lady friends and I told him to introduce his self. He started off with "My name is *****. I like long walks on the beach. I'm the absolute best at fellatio" to which I immediately cut him off and corrected him yelling "HE MEANS CUNNILINGUS! CUNNILINGUS!"

- I'm wired off of donut sugar

- I won my first regular season game. (Ravens 13 - Bengals 7)

- I really want to get laid. This "sex hiatus" that I'm being forced into taking is helping increase the intimacy of my relationship.

- My lying co-worker still gropes his cousin

- One of my co-workers just made me laugh and shoot donut crumbs out of my nose. In front of a customer.

- To Schoolin: I don't have any of Charles Hamilton's pre-DJ Skee mixtapes. The first mixtape I downloaded by him was Outside Looking.

- My beats are awesome. I might even rap soon.

- Way more women have seen my penis without getting penetrated this year than I'm comfortable with.

- My younger brother is a ho.

That's it. Hopefully I have my internet up by tomorrow.

4 comments:

Reggie said...

WOW....

So you work at a Dunkin's Donuts?!?

:)

Paula said...

My one friend cracked me up with the Autralian ambassador on the phone. I was like "Hello, yes sir, we're wahahahahahahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA... Sorry there's something... WAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA Sorry about that. Please hold." I nearly got shat on lucky he was feeling humourous. Otherwise...

Super Woman said...

"Way more women have seen my penis without getting penetrated this year than I'm comfortable with."

L M A O

Tuotierugif >^..^<© said...

lol @ your lil bro being a ho! ;)