Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Mmm, heartburn

Well, I'm sitting up and it's 2:54 a.m. and my chest has been burning all day. I figured I'd take this time to talk about me and acid reflux disease.

Now, acid reflux feels like. . . hmm. . . let's say someone constantly pouring boiling hot water on the center of your esophagus right about where it turns into your stomach. That shit isn't very pleasant.

I actually had to pause just then to absorb the pain of esophageal heat rape. So, yeah, I took medicine for it, but I haven't renewed my prescription in Flying Spaghetti Monster knows how long. I should probably work on that.

The thing is, this doesn't happen everyday. Hell, I might start getting severe heartburn every month or so, so it rarely crosses my mind until it starts happening. My doctor says if this continues to happen repeatedly, it'll burn a hole in my chest and I'll bleed profusely(D=), so it would behoove me to let my shit heal.

How would I do that without medicine, you ask? Well, one choice is to drink milk. Milk has something in it that coats my esophageal lining, so it helps somewhat. I also have to avoid drinking orange juice and anything else with citric acid in it and avoid eating spicy foods, which is mega gay.

Either way, it takes a few weeks for that shit to adequately heal, so that would be a long time to go without spicy foods. My girlfriend and my best friend(thats Malcolm) freak out and shit when I do stupid shit like drink hot sauce or get extra hots on my subs, but those rarely cause it to act up. While those do contribute a small amount, it may have something to do with some biologic or structural factors that my doctor hasn't found out yet.

I need to set up an appointment for a doctor to look down my throat(No "Pop Champagne" video).

2 comments:

Tuotierugif >^..^<© said...

hope you feel better soon, and uh try to keep your prescription up to date cause that hole in the chest thing...all I keep seeing is that commercial of the guy with the hole in his throat and...yea lol

Super Woman said...

LOL @ Toutierugif ...

I was thinking about that commercial toooooo!!

but yeah my sister and brother drink hot sauce and i used to want to fight them because that shit doesnt seem normal to me.

CUT THAT OUT!!

Feel better soon