Thursday, November 20, 2008

The shit me and my little brother talk about on the phone

These are excerpts from an actual phone conversation between me and my brother.

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Me: I ain't even gonna lie, Keri Hilson sexy as shit

Terrell: Yeah

Me: I'd skeet on her elbows
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(Talking about Lil Wayne)
Me: . . . and he got a Marilyn Monroe

Terrell: He got one on his eyebrow, too

Me: WHAT?
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(Talking about him talking to a 20 year old((He's 17)))
Me: She gon go to jail

Terrell: Nobody said anything about you and Jasmine

Me: Nigga, she less than a year older than me!
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(Lil Wayne again)
Terrell: He outta control, man

Me: Yeah, his fans keep saying "Yeah, keep drinking Syrup and-

Terrell: Nah, I'm talking about me
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(Talking about how much fun our little brother Kyree is)
Me: No, he's not

Terrell: Yeah, he is

Me: He's about as fun as getting a needle in the scrotum
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Me: gamaluhhemmmm

Terell: What?

Me: gamallauhgemmmmm

Terrell: Yo, I got you. You lucky I can't. . . I got you
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Terrell: Ma, give me a hug

Me: Aw, yo a mama's boy

Terrell: Ya mama a mama's boy!
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Terrell: C'mon, ma. C'mon, ma. C'mon, ma.

Me: Yo sound like he hollering at a chick.
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Me:. . . Man, let me click over real quick

Terrell: Yeah, click over, bitch!

Me: Nig-. . . Grrrrrrr.
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Me: Play Cloths drops tonight!

Terrell: What's that?

Me: The Clipse clothing line.

Terrell: Hold on, dyke.

Me: Oh, word?
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(Talking about trying to get him an Xbox 360 for Christmas)
Me: I gotta see if Daddy gonna put up some money for it

Terrell: You're the biggest big brother with the biggest big back in the world!
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Terrell: Yo, you need to get me a lime green skully

Me: Why? So you can look like a highlighter?
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(Talking about a chick that had the least ass I've ever seen)
Me: Yo, I think she should just let a bunch of black guys stand in a line and she walks down it and let them spit on her.
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(Talking to Theardra, Terrell's ex-girlfriend on three-way)
Me: Word, Theardra, you pregnant?

Theardra: Yeah, a while ago me and Terrell spent a night together, I woke up and I threw up-

Me: LOL
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(I asked Theardra how her mom was doing and Terrell assumed I had ulterior motives)
Terrell: You don't know Eric

Me: What do you mean? I'm a completely trustworthy male

Terrell: No, you're not! Suck a fat one!

Me: That was rude
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Terrell: Yo, this Gucci Mane song be rocking

Me: Yo, get out of my face with that Gucci Mane shit.
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Me: Yo, her friend ******* sexy as shit

Terrell: Aight, yo-

Me: I just wanna, like, crawl in her bed.
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Terrell: You gonna be mad when you hear this.

Me: What is you talking about?

(Music playing)

Me: I don't even know what that is

(Finally hears song)

Me: No this nigga not over here listening to the MOTHERFUCKINGTINGTINGS.
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(Singing along with Anyway, that Kanye West song)
Terrell: Eric, why are you so paranoid?

Me: Get the FUCK OUT MY FACE
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That's him. Heeeee's a dork.

10 comments:

Unknown said...

Sounds like you and your ho bro having a convo

Gallardo Bastardo said...

Either you're being sarcastic or you just wanted to use that lame rhyme. SMARTEN UP NAS.

Gorgeous Lynette said...

hilarity. skeet on her elbows. & this man who my aunt worked with put one too many needles down his dick and they got stuck!

Gallardo Bastardo said...

Eww, Lynette, eww. . . and ouch. . .

Stephanie said...

Please explain to me this damn fascination of skeet... EVERYWHERE? haha.

& LMAO @ --
Terrell: You gonna be mad when you hear this.
Me: What is you talking about?
(Music playing)
Me: I don't even know what that is
(Finally hears song)
Me: No this nigga not over here listening to the MOTHERFUCKINGTINGTINGS.

Stephanie said...

Oh yeah, & I like his hair (:

Unknown said...

It was sarcasm. The rhyme happened by accident, YOU TAE BO HO.

DKNY OH MY IM JIGGY said...

the ting tings are the shit ...

shut up and let me go .....

and your brothers cute im 20 and i'd def. hit that....LOL

A said...

I love it! I know your never bored when he's around lol

[$ H A R O N A] said...

ROFL!!